Impaled Rodeo Cowboy Weekly coming soon?

The legendary soon-to-be-Mrs. Happyflapjacks and I were at a grocery store last night when she pointed out the following periodical:

Really? I mean I looked through the whole thing and couldn't find an Onion logo anywhere. Things that just make this silly:

1. Look at that PICTURE!!!! Dad: "Oh Johnny, life is sooooo good now that I only have to deal with your spoiled ass once every other weekend!" Johnny: "Thanks for taking me to the Cheesy Fake Backdrop Emporium Daddy! One day, when I've grown to resent you for destroying my childhood because you couldn't keep your hands off the babysitter, I'll look back on this day and cry...with my therapist!"


2. There's actually a story called "Downsizing with Style". On the cover of a magazine titled "Divorce". Now the article is actually about deciding what to keep and what to throw out when you move into your new home. But it sounds like the article is going to be about how to stylishly downsize your family (aka: Divorce).


3. SHE pointed out that the "O" in divorce is a broken ring....how cool is that.


4. This magazine claims to have been around since 1996. Really?

Sorry, this is just the funniest thing I've seen in a while. Some great uses for this magazine:

1. Leave on co-worker's desk who is currently involved in a less-than-secret affair with another co-worker. Make sure it is in a prominent place where the office paprazzi will be able to see it. NOTE: This works best if the target co-worker is out of the office.


2. If you are recently married, leave copy in bathroom when parents/in-laws come over to visit. Wait for explosion


3. Roll up as tight as possible and whack the first person you see.


4. Ninja throwing stars.